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Monday, March 7, 2011

Stock Market Update 03/07/2011

All three major indexes plummeted today as investors realized for the very first time that WE DON"T PRODUCE OUR OWN OIL!!! The cross-dressing madman that is target practicing on his own people in Libya has got most rational thinking Americans concerned about the stability of our energy supply. Several high falutin' stock brokers were seen today huddled beneath park benches on Wall Street muttering "Drill Baby Drill".

The White House released information today stating that "President Obama spits in the eye of everyone who doesn't drive a Prius," It was a significant sign of victory for the Obama administration as he closes in on fulfilling his campaign promises of $5.00 per Gallon Gasoline.

Disclaimer: This post may contain certain amounts of satire. However, the satire may have an eerie resemblance to the joke that exists in real life.


  1. "Our energy costs would necessarily skyrocket."

    Direct quote from candidate Obama. Boy are we stupid. This guy won't back drilling, especially after he licked the Saud kings shoes. I am starting to hope the Mayans are right.

  2. Dan,

    Did he actually say that?

  3. Patriot,

    The Mayans aren't the only ones with a calendar ending in 2012. The Chinese, Native American, Inuit, and another that I can't recall all end next year.

    I'm optimistic and take it as a sign that we start over... no liberals.

  4. No Hardnox, I don't have record of him spitting in the eye...pure satire. It wouldn't surprise me though. He has stated his desire, as Patriot points out, for high energy costs. He has also stated that he wants to destroy the coal industry.

  5. I have started campaigning for Obama 2012!!

    Let it be his last year in office.

  6. You said to refrain from profanity, so I won't be commenting.

  7. Come on Paul, certainly there's a way that you can say that you've been a complete fool for not seeing this, without cussing! LOL

  8. Fine: number one, when did he say either thing?

  9. The tragedy of our current situation is that it is one of our own making. Remember Bill Clinton remarking that if we started drilling then we wouldn’t see that oil for 10-15 years? Well we would have been driving on that oil for the last six years now. Liberals have no vision – they are incapable of seeing the unintended (but very predictable) consequences of their actions. Liberals have regulated, litigated, and legislated America into a corner that we might not be able to get out of.

    From the abandonment of the Yucca Mountain nuclear waste repository to burning food to make bad gas liberals continue to hamstring our economy, raise prices, and chase jobs off shore. Putting Obama in charge appears to be tantamount to pushing the self-destruct button on the US Ship of State. I was hopeful that being placed right in the middle of all the information that is available to him and given the mounting evidence that his policies are destroying the country – even Obama would reverse course. Unfortunately I was wrong.

  10. My mother used to say that something good comes out of every bad situation. With all that is happening in the Middle East, we should heed the wake-up call to stop our dependence on oil and find alternative sources. Even if we do start drilling, our own supply is far less than our demand. Sometimes it comes down to personal responsibility, more so than partisanship.

  11. Dear Paul Barry, I put in place a disclaimer to address your concerns. Thank you for stopping by. Your business is important to us YOU SNAPPERHEADED WEASEL!!!

    Do you feel the luv man?

  12. CS I read an old Time magazine from the late 70's. We were talking about energy independence then. I'm clueless as to why this country, administration after administration, has avoided it's most important responsibilities. Sarah Palin comes out with a motto "Drill baby drill" it was being spouted everywhere. Obama wins the election, I haven't heard that call since.

  13. Cher. I'm sure that at some point this country will either achieve energy independence, or cease to exist as a world power. When they turn off the tap of oil we are gonna be hurting. We haven't built refineries in 30 or 40 years. Nuclear power isn't even allowed to be on the table. Fossil fuels or nukes are going to have to play a major role in our energy for some time. As CS already commented turning out food into oil has disrupted our food supplies. Wind mills and solar power are not going to run America. Checking air pressure in your tires, and riding a bike is not going to solve things either. Personal changes might make a small dent in things, but we need a comprehensive overhaul in our energy policies in my opinion.(not so humble.) lol

  14. Actually Cher - we have a sufficient amount of oil in readily accessible locations that we could be pumping more than our daily needs in short order. It would drive down the price of fuel dramatically, create millions of jobs, and create a stunning reversal of the current economic malaise. There is no shortage of oil - that is a liberal myth.

    Were we to move forward with a true "all of the above" strategy that includes nuclear, coal, and natural gas - it would super charge the economy all around the world.

    The only things that we know that don't work are the "Green" alternatives - wind, solar, and bio.

    Check out the real truth at The Heritage Foundation:


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  17. It is absolutely true that we have plenty of oil. But personal responsibility is important, too. If we would use our personal responsibility to purchase American made goods and services, the price of oil will drop because China, India, and Indonesia would quit buying oil with our money. So go be responsible, and buy American.

  18. Patriot Excellent point! Buy local, buy American!


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